HOW TO NURTURE A POSTPARTUM PARENT

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Your partner has just had your baby, now what? Life has changed in so many ways and you know that your relationship is going to have a new dynamic with this latest addition to your family. You want to maintain your connection as a couple and let them know that you are here to help. The healing process can look different for everyone, depending on your partner’s mental and physical health, the type of birth they had, and the type of person they are. One way you can figure out how to nurture your partner in a way that’s meaningful for them is to lean into the love languages that are important to them. Keep reading for some tips on how to do that:

QUALITY TIME

If spending time together and receiving undivided attention is your partner’s thing, consider setting up weekly date nights. Either by finding a babysitter and going out, or by getting creative and setting something romantic up at home. It doesn’t have to be expensive or fancy, just an opportunity for connection outside of parenthood, while your baby is asleep between feeds. These dates can start off short, while you navigate your new routine, and then get longer as you find your breastfeeding rhythm. You could also do household and parenting tasks together as a team, or make the effort to pay attention to the little clues as to what your partner needs and do it for her, so that she feels seen and appreciated.

PHYSICAL TOUCH

If being affectionate makes you guys feel closer, get into the habit of giving her massages as you wind down for the night. As her body is still healing, it is important to follow the directions from your doctor when it comes to intimacy and to go at her pace. Be mindful of new body hang-ups she may have and speak love into her. Have discussions about what the new boundaries are when it comes to affection, as a breastfeeding mother she may feel touched out at times and need you to respect her space. If you notice that she’s struggling in that way, take the initiative to be more affectionate to older children, so that their needs are met by you when she needs distance.

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION

If whispering sweet nothings is her jam, layer on the compliments. Recognise all that she is doing for your family and express your gratitude through your words and actions. Give her pep talks when she needs a boost, remind her of her breastfeeding affirmations and reassure her that she is doing an amazing job as a new mother. Maybe write love notes, cards or letters to each other to document your postpartum/parenting journey and keep that spark alive.

GIFTS

Who doesn’t love a push present? Giving her gifts doesn’t have to break the bank, it can be as simple as remembering the things she likes and picking them up when you’re out without being asked. Stocking the cupboards and fridge with her favourite snacks while she’s breastfeeding and hungry, or buying her fresh flowers as a little pick me up. You could also treat her to some self-care treatments and look after the baby - like getting her nails done, having a massage, getting her hair done etc.

ACTS OF SERVICE

If your queen enjoys being served, this is your time to be more proactive with household chores, looking after older children, and generally taking tasks off her to do list to lighten the load. This could also mean setting boundaries with visitors to ensure that she’s not overtired and given the privacy she needs to breastfeed. Pay attention to any signs that her physical or mental health could be taking a hit, and talk to her about it or book her into to see someone. It could even be as simple as inviting over her friends when you know she needs that community love.

Another way you can nurture a postpartum parent is to invest in The Intuitive Journey’s Mindful Baby digital course. This six-week programme focuses on a new topic each week to help breastfeeding mamas lean into their new role as a mother, reflect on their experiences and set achievable goals for their healing. It offers a safe space to vent, judgment free, and receive real-time latch support to make their feeding journey a little easier. If you’re interested in hearing more about the course, book in your free clarity call.

Love, Megan